Every time you turn around there seems to be “Breaking News”. News about the tax overhaul, healthcare reform, the “Me Too” movement, “DACA”, and school shootings can upsetting and overwhelming, and it is difficult for anyone to keep up. Our residents are not alone in wanting to stay current on events in the news. While more and more people are getting their news online these days, (According to the Pew Research Center, as of October 2017, 30% of Americans age 65 and older get their news online, which is an increase from 20% in 2016.),  I would estimate that close to 95% of Handmaker residents still get their news from the TV and the newspaper. And for the last 6 months or so, some get their news from our Current Events class.

This group of 75-100+-year-olds meets every month to discuss what is going on in the world, and in their own community. These Handmaker residents are remarkably well informed on their own from watching TV and reading the newspaper, but meeting together as a group gives them an opportunity to get a better understanding about some of the issues in the news, and even more importantly for most, a chance to discuss the news with others in their community. It really gets them thinking.

Each meeting generally focuses on a few topics that seem to be the most prominent issues of the moment. Residents have the opportunity to read a selection of articles about the topics that are made available to them a few days before the class. When we meet, we start with an overview of each topic, and then the discussion begins. We have some very bright, well-read residents, who also have some strong opinions from across the political spectrum.

This week’s discussion focused mainly on the shooting at a Florida High School. Every resident was upset about the news, and shared their feelings and thoughts. We discussed the fortitude of the students, and debated the various proposals in the news that were being suggested to tackle the issue of school shootings, and gun violence in general. We also talked about the NRA, and how much influence it has on politicians. While political affiliations at Handmaker run the spectrum, and there is not always agreement on the issues, on this topic, there was agreement on the following: 1) Teachers should not be armed. 2) No one needs to have access to an assault weapon, or any device that could turn a gun into an assault weapon. 3) There should be background checks for mental stability and criminal records before anyone can purchase any gun. 4) There should be a waiting period of a few days before any gun is allowed to be purchased. There was plenty of discussion about the second amendment, and how heavily armed Americans are. While some of our residents expressed that they did not think anyone should own a gun, there were also some who felt that Americans should have the right to own a gun to protect themselves. Everyone agreed that no one should have an assault weapon. One resident suggested that even if we do have stricter gun laws in place, criminals will find a way to purchase one, and a few agreed with this.

Our Current Event class always involves some lively, but civil, discussion and debate. Some issues are more controversial than others, and some are harder to understand than others. “Net Neutrality” was a tough one.  I tried to give them an overview of what the internet was, and what “net neutrality” meant. Since none of them grew up with the internet, and few use it today, it is a just very difficult concept for many of them to grasp. Since very few of our residents have any understanding of what social media is, it was also not easy to explain about how Russians may have interfered with elections through social media. I showed them my Facebook newsfeed on my smartphone so that they could get an idea, but when it is not something that you use, it is difficult to understand. Many residents have gained an understanding of what google is, though. Whenever they ask about something that I do not know, I look it up on my smartphone. They love that! So, we will continue to stay current here at Handmaker, in any way that we can.

While many people are familiar with the Jewish New Year of Rosh Hashanah, not everyone knows that there are actually four Jewish New Year celebrations, each with a unique set of traditions. This week we celebrated one of them, Tu b’shevat. Tu B’shevat is the New Year of the trees. It is observed on the 15^th of the month of Shevat, which fell on January 31st this year. Tu b’shevat is the day that is used to determine the age of the trees. The 15^th of Shevat is considered their birthday, no matter when they were planted. Why is it important to know the age of trees? Since the Torah says that fruits may not be eaten from trees that are less than three years of age, those who observe this practice must know the age of trees around them.

One of the customs of this holiday is to plant trees. Some people also like to plant parsley, thinking ahead for its use during the Passover Seder. Another custom is to have a Tu b’shevat Seder. This is similar to the Passover Seder, in that there is an order or ritual to it, but without the meal. Instead of a full meal, a variety of fruits are eaten, sometimes new fruits, or fruits from the seven species; wheat, barley, grapes, figs, pomegranates, olives and dates; and special blessings are said throughout the Seder. During this Seder we also have four cups of wine or grape juice, in varying shade of red as it is mixed with the white wine, representing the four seasons. Rabbi Stephanie Aaron from Tucson’s Congregation Chaverim led a very beautiful Seder for Handmaker residents earlier this week.

As for the other Jewish New Years…

The next one coming up is just before Passover, on the 1^st of the month of Nisan, or March 17 of this year. It corresponds to the birth of the Israelite nation after our Exodus out of Egypt. While Passover actually begins on the 15^th of Nisan, the Torah says that “this month [Nisan] shall mark for you the beginning of the months, it shall be the first months of the year to you” (Exodus 12:2). Thus, the first of Nisan begins the New Year for the cycle of Jewish holidays. The Torah goes on to say (Leviticus 23:5-6)  ^“Passover begins at twilight on the fourteenth day of the first month. On the fifteenth day of that month the Lord’s Festival of Unleavened Bread begins; for seven days you must eat bread made without yeast”. Clearly, this New Year is celebrated with the observance of Passover, and the Passover Seder. This New Year was also considered the New Year when counting the years of the reigns of kings in ancient Israel.

We celebrate another Jewish New Year on the 1^st of Elul or August 12 of this year. According to the Mishnah, this was the New Year for the Temple-based ritual of selecting which domestic animals were to be tithed, or taxed. Since animal tithing is no longer practiced today, the celebration of this lesser known New Year has become more of a celebration of animals, a time to appreciate the role that animals play in our lives. Some refer it as the New Year for Animals.

The fourth Jewish New Year is the one that we are all most familiar with, Rosh Hashanah, meaning the head of the year. It is the birthday of the world, the anniversary of when Adam and Eve were created. We celebrate this well-known Jewish New Year on the 1st of Tishrei, or beginning on the eve of September 9 of this year. This New Year is celebrated with a candle lighting in the evenings, festival meals, prayer services which include Torah readings and the sounding of the Shofar, apples and honey, and is generally a joyous day spent with family and friends. 

How lucky are we to have so many different New Year celebrations every year!

(Disclaimer: Since I am not a Torah scholar, I generally rely on other resources for information on Jewish subjects that I am unfamiliar with. Please excuse any unintended inaccuracies in this blog)

While the Jewish New Year of 5778 began several months ago, and Jews around the world participated in a period of self-reflection at that time, with the beginning of the secular New Year of 2018, many Jewish Americans will still join in the annual secular tradition of making New Year’s resolutions. The Marist Poll estimates that about 44% of Americans will be doing so this week, with most Americans focusing on self-improvement. Historians believe that his tradition actually goes all the way back to ancient times, over 4000 years ago, when the Babylonians would annually affirm their covenant with their gods during the spring harvest, and of course the Jewish people have been making their version of New Year’s resolutions around the Jewish New Year of Rosh Hashanah for over 5000 years. I wondered how many of our Handmaker residents participated in this annual secular tradition.

Clearly many of our residents enjoy the tradition of the celebration of the secular New Year, as evidenced by the great turnout at Handmaker’s annual New Year’s Eve party this year. About 70 residents made their way to the festively decorated Great Room to ring in the New Year with the music of Klezmerkaba, a local Klezmer ensemble. There was plenty of bubbly available -- ginger ale and punch that is -- as well as delicious appetizers and desserts.

But, with regard to participating in the tradition of making New Year’s resolutions, it seems that the majority of our residents who were asked said that they do not. I was surprised. Here are some of their responses:

“I don’t. I don’t think that I would keep them. I have tried. It always sounds nice, but it never happens.”

“Why bother? I just break them.”

“I used to, but not anymore.”

“Why make them? I break them.”

“I don’t. I just make a list each day and I try to accomplish as much as I can from that list.”

“I don’t make any resolutions, I just hope that my family has a happy and healthy year.”

“I do, but they are personal.”

“I do. I consider my stage in life, my age, and resolve to do some things differently in the coming year. It is about self-reflection.”

“Yes I do. I am going to just try to do my best. I am older and can’t do everything that I want to do, but I am going to do my best.”

“I make the same resolution every day. ‘Let every day be better than yesterday.’ And it usually is.”

“To lose weight. I make it every year. And I keep it, except for the holidays. I also plan to walk every day.”

“Not anymore. Not for years.”

Those residents who admitted that they do make New Year’s resolutions seem to follow the general trend of most Americans, they make them about self-improvement. A few even said that they prefer to make daily resolutions or intentions.

Most of the residents who I spoke with who said that they do not make resolutions said that they do not do so because they believe that when they have made them in the past, they simply have not kept them. So, as some said, why bother? Since most of our residents have lived eight, nine and even ten decades, perhaps there is some wisdom in this that we can learn from. Maybe we should listen to our elders and just take each day as it comes. After all, they have certainly lived and learned.

Whatever traditions you follow, we wish you and your family a happy and healthy 2018.

Even though Hanukkah is considered a minor Jewish holiday, it is one that most Jewish people get great pleasure in celebrating. Perhaps its celebration has been magnified due to its close proximity to Christmas on the calendar, but it is also likely that it is because there are some great traditions associated with it that make it so enjoyable to celebrate. These traditions live on in the memories of our residents, and we continue them here at Handmaker as well.

Hanukkah is a celebration and commemoration of miracles that happened in the second century BCE. At that time, Israel was ruled by Syrian-Greeks who tried to force the Jews to accept Greek culture and beliefs, to assimilate. Against all odds, a small band of faithful Jews, the Maccabees, led by Judah the Maccabee, defeated one of the mightiest armies on earth, the Greeks. They drove the Greeks from the land, reclaimed the Holy Temple in Jerusalem and rededicated it to the service of G‑d. Hanukkah means “dedication”.

When the Jews went to light the Temple's menorah (the regular seven-branched candelabrum), they found only enough olive oil that had escaped contamination by the Greeks to last one day. Miraculously, they lit the menorah and the one-day supply of oil lasted for eight days, which was how long it took to prepare new oil under conditions of ritual purity.

Today we celebrate this eight day “festival of lights” with a nightly lighting of a special candelabrum called a “menorah” or “hanukkiah”. Hanukkah begins this year at sundown on December 12.

We will the light a menorah in every neighborhood at Handmaker each night, singing the blessing and  songs that tell the story of Hanukah. We will play a traditional Hanukkah game called “dreidel” with Hanukkah gelt (foil wrapped chocolate coins) as well, with families and youth groups who visit us. It is heartwarming to see residents who have difficulty remembering what they had for lunch, sing along to the Hanukkah blessings and songs, and spin a dreidel with great proficiency.

Since  the Hanukkah miracle involved oil, it is customary to eat foods fried in oil. Most everyone loves a good potato latke (pancake) with applesauce and/or sour cream, and some like to eat the jelly-filled sufganyot (doughnut).  Our residents prefer latkes, and will be treated to them throughout the week!

If the Maccabees had not defeated the Greeks, and the Jews had all been forced to assimilate, there might not be any Jewish people around today. If that is not a reason enough to celebrate this minor holiday, then latkes and sufganyot certainly are!

Happy Hanukkah!

If you have visited Handmaker recently, you may have seen a silver haired woman in a purple sweater buzzing around in her scooter. That is Gertrude Shankman. She recently had to slow down the speed on her scooter a bit due to a few speeding tickets, but nothing else about her seems to be slowing down. This remarkable woman was born in NY on October 26, 1914, and is celebrating her 103^rd birthday this week. You would never guess that after spending any time with her. She is still unbelievably sharp, and fully engaged in life.

On her family

Gertrude grew up in what she thought of as an orthodox Jewish home. Her parents were from what she calls “the Old Country”. Her Dad was from Austria and her mom from Poland. Her dad was a kosher butcher and she spent time working the cash register in his shop after school. She can still pick out a good cut of meat. Her parents were part of the “Oelbaum Society”. The Oelbaum Society is a group of descendants of “Reb Yaacov Koppel Lukower, named Elbaum. The Holy Reb Yaacov Koppel of the Town of Lukow (who) passed away on 15 Adar 5529 (1769) (and was) laid to rest in the town of Tarnigrod”, according to the website Oelbaum.com.

Gertrude met and married her husband Ben when she was 19. She was very close with Ben’s parents who were involved in the “Workman’s Circle”, which was a social and cultural Jewish labor fraternal order that supported the labor and socialist movements of the world. This is still a vibrant social and cultural Jewish Group today.

During the depression, Gertrude and Ben both had a hard time getting employment. Ben had several jobs at once to make ends meet, including playing in a band at nights. It was not easy, but they survived. They eventually were able to open a shoe store, where Gertrude helped out, and they prospered. They raised two children together, have five grandchildren and five great grandchildren, and their lives were always full of music and great adventures. They retired to Florida in the 90’s.

On Judaism

“Faith is important to me”, says Gertrude. “Believing in something. It is who I am. I would never want to be anything else.” After Gertrude married her husband Ben, they moved to Manchester, Connecticut, and joined a Conservative Congregation called Beth Shalom. She says that there were 50 members, and that the members of the Jewish community in the town were very well respected, as was the Rabbi. When a Jewish child in town got into a little trouble, the child was brought to the Rabbi for him to take care of the problem.

She felt that the more “Americanized” version of Judaism that she practiced in Connecticut was more inspiring and interesting to her than the Judaism that she had grown up with. Gertrude loved volunteering as a teacher at the Temple Sunday School, and got much of her Jewish education from the Rabbi there. Her son and daughter continued their education there through confirmation, but she did not really participate in the services there. It was not until she moved into Handmaker over ten years ago that she began attending services regularly and had her very first Aliya. Before that, she did not even know what an Aliya was.

Gertrude has continued her Jewish education at Handmaker, attending Shabbat morning services regularly, all the Holiday services, actively participating in Torah Study once a week, and attending any Jewish programming that she can. She was curious about what Kabbalah was, so Rabbi Ceitlin, from Congregation Young Israel, was generous enough to come to Handmaker and teach a few Kabbalah classes to the residents. She is always one of the most engaged participants in any class that she attends at Handmaker. And that is saying something.

On her secret to longevity

When I recently asked her secret to longevity was, she said one word, “accepting”. She says that she always tries to make the best of what comes along. Each time something happens to her, she thinks “this is it”. She says that “there is this thing (death) always staring me in the face. But you cannot dwell on it. Tragedies come in to your life, but you have to try to move on.” But it is hard to forget some. She lost her Great Grandson Joshua less than 5 years ago. That she will never forget. But she says that self-pity is the worst. You have to keep your mind off of your problems. Have a hobby or a craft. That is where knitting and crocheting come in for her, and reading. She still knits and crochets kippot and other items for the Kiosk in the Handmaker Lobby, but not like she used to. She also started a knitting class at Handmaker, and still participates once a week. She does not read quite as much as she would like to, her eyes are not as good as they used to be, but she still does as much as she can.

On Living at Handmaker

Gertrude says that living at Handmaker is very comfortable. She initially moved into one of Handmaker’s Besserman Independent Living apartments when she moved here from Florida over 10 years ago. She moved into Assisted Living about five years ago. Moving into Handmaker was an adjustment for her. She had always lived independently in her own house and had lived on the east coast her whole life. She says that the people here in Tucson were different, much more casual.  And she still cannot get used to any kind of Mexican food. Handmaker has been good to her. She has made some dear friends over the years, and the staff always help in any way that they can. She likes to participate in as many activities as she can, to stay active mentally, and physically, and to get to know other residents. And it is important to her that Handmaker is Jewish. She really likes being able to observe Jewish Holidays, attend services, and be a part of a Jewish Community. As far as living communally goes, she equates living in an institution to living in a dormitory. She says that you have to do your best to get along with everyone. And try to help one another when you can. That is like what life is. And that is what people at Handmaker do. It is not always easy, and you can find fault with everything and everyone if you let yourself.

As a survivor of both polio and cancer, Gertrude’s mere existence today at age 103 is pretty remarkable. But it is her emotional, intellectual and energetic presence that seem most inspirational to me. She is so full of life, so curious about the world around her, and has so much wisdom to share. And while she says that she does not want anyone to plan any more birthday parties for her in the future, when she learned that her caregiver takes care of someone who is 106 she said, “I wonder what it would feel like to be 106.”

Handmaker residents joyously celebrated Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year of 5778, with beautiful festive meals and holiday services. This celebration was followed by the Days of Awe, the ten days between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. This is a time for introspection. It is period of time to think about what you have done over the previous year, and to seek reconciliation with anyone that you may have wronged throughout the year.

 On Rosh Hashanah, the book of life is opened, and what we do during these Days of Awe is what determines whether we will be inscribed and sealed into the book for a good new year. On Yom Kippur, the book is sealed. 

In order to alter our fate and be sealed into the book of life, there are three ways to be forgiven for any sins committed: T’shuvah, a spiritual return;  Tefillah, prayer; or Tzedakah, charity.

For the second year in a row, Benzy Kogen joined us at Handmaker to help our wonderful Service Leaders, Mel Cohn, Dan Asia and Michael Rosensweig, lead our High Holiday services. Benzy Kogen is a Jewish Educator from California, and he gave a talk while he was here about the meaning of repentance and return during the Days of Awe. During the lecture, when he asked why the Days of Awe were awesome, one resident responded, “Because we want to live longer.” We all chuckled, because perhaps that is really the crux of it. We all want to be sealed in the book of life for another year. But of course, there is more to it than that.

Benzy asked the residents to reflect back not only on the past year, but on what their holiday celebrations were like before they came to Handmaker. They spoke about being surrounded by family during festive celebrations, yummy foods like honey cake and sponge cake, shopping for new clothes for the holidays, and family meals. Many of them miss what they had before moving in to Handmaker, but they all appreciate that Handmaker provides much of what they remember from their Holiday celebrations in the past. Unfortunately we cannot bring back their families, or their youth, or buy them beautiful new clothes. But our holiday meals are festive, we try and serve the holiday foods that they remember and enjoy, and our holiday tables are filled with their Handmaker family members. One of residents actually said that her holiday meals were much lonelier before she came to Handmaker.

Our Handmaker Yom Kippur was solemn, full of prayer all day long, and followed by a beautiful break fast. And I hope that everyone was sealed in the book of life for a good year ahead.

Throughout these high holidays, staff members asked me a lot of questions about the meaning of the holidays and the customs associated. When I explained to one staff member about what the Jewish New Year was and how the Days of Awe are a time of reflection and repentance, she asked if it was like the secular New Year and the resolutions that so many people make. I agreed that there were some similarities, but that we don’t repent at the Jewish New Year for not staying on our diet or exercise plan. That it is more about spiritual reflection on the past year. I also explained how we apologize to others for anything that we may have done to offend them over the past year, and forgive others for what they may have done to us, so that we can all go into the New Year with a clean slate. Every staff member that I spoke to about this thought that the idea of apologizing and forgiving on an annual basis was amazing. I agree.

Having the opportunity to explain and teach about the rituals of the High Holidays and the Days of Awe to others reminds me of how truly awesome they are.  

When one of our Handmaker residents expressed an interest in converting to Judaism earlier this year, I was speechless. For nearly 18 months, Elaine had been attending Shabbat evening and morning services every week, came to all of the Jewish holiday services and programs, and was an active participant in our weekly Torah study sessions, so it really should not have come as so much of a surprise. But yet, it was. It is one thing to participate in Jewish services to expand your knowledge of the world around you, but it is another thing to want to change your faith, especially this late in life. I was surprised, but I was also delighted for her and for our community.

Elaine and her late husband came to live in Handmaker in November of 2015. They chose Handmaker because it was Jewish, had a wonderful reputation, kosher food and facilities where she could live in Assisted Living and her husband could stay in the skilled nursing area. Unfortunately, her husband passed away shortly after they moved in. After his passing, Elaine was so touched by how much love and support she received from staff and residents as a newly widowed person.

For more than a year, Elaine has been attending services regularly, and learning about Judaism through services, Torah Study, and other Jewish programming. Through her studies, she has learned to appreciate the Jewish ethics of repairing the world and welcoming strangers, and how the emphasis in Judaism is on collective prayer and action, not upon asking for spiritual guidance or help.  Judaism is a way of life. Everyone is expected to be kind and helpful to one another, and she has seen that in action at Handmaker.  She is amazed by how the teens that come to Handmaker for intergenerational programs treat one another and the residents. She has observed the strong sense of community amongst the Jewish people, and while she already feels somewhat a part of that by living at Handmaker and from her close friendships with many of the Jewish residents, she wanted to truly become a part of the Jewish people by converting to Judaism.

With the help of Rabbi Howard Schwartz, who leads Torah Study at Handmaker, and Rabbi Avraham Alpert, of Congregation Bet Shalom, Elaine has made that dream a reality. She has been studying diligently, reading voraciously and has amazed us all with her unwavering commitment to this goal.

On Wednesday, August 9, 2017 (the 17^th of Av, 5777), Elaine met with the Bet Shalom Beit Din, consisting of Rabbi Schwartz, Rabbi Alpert and Rabbi Bennet Blum, and completed her conversion to Judaism. I had the distinct honor of accompanying her to the meeting, and to the Mikvah afterwards, along with her dear friend Carolee. Words cannot describe the beauty and emotion of this Mikvah experience. Both Carolee and I feel that being with Elaine at this moment was one of the most meaningful and memorable experiences of our lives.  

They say that the newly converted have a glow after they come out of the Mikvah, in part because they have been to Sinai and received the 10 commandments at that moment. There is no question that Elaine was glowing after her conversion, and has been walking steadily and surely on this new path that she has begun. And we are all walking right by her side.

Irving Silverman is an expert in the art of aging. While most people at the age of 97 would be slowing down, Irving has just published his second book, Aging Wisely…Wisdom of Our Elders. It is a book about aging and longevity from the perspective of the elderly, as well as from many experts in the field of aging. It includes many inspiring life stories, in addition to information on the biology of aging and emotional responses to aging. There are insights into finding fulfilment in the later years, and how to use your internal strengths and the resources of the world around you to help to navigate the process of aging. This book will inspire readers to lead full and engaged lives into their 90s and beyond, as well as to appreciate the elders in their midst.

Born in 1920, Irving grew up in Brooklyn, NY, and graduated from the City College of New York’s Baruch School of Business with a degree in advertising and publishing. He had a 45 year career at the National Knitwear Association, but was most proud of his achievements in community service. After retiring, he created the Kosher Food and Jewish Life Expo. He established and led the Long Island Chapter of Parents without Partners after the death of his first wife, Henrietta. He was president of the New York Region of United Synagogue, and led an effort in 1980 to allow Jews to emigrate from the Soviet Union. He and his second wife, Nancy, built a lighthouse on their property in Maine, and after her passing in 2002, he designated the lighthouse as a wedding chapel and officiated at 35 wedding ceremonies there. In 2008, Irving wrote an autobiography and tribute to his wives, A Trilogy…Three Hearts…One Soul. Irving moved to Tucson in the mid-nineties and was an active member of the board of Handmaker from 2007-2010. He also participated in Handmaker’s Adventure Bus Program. He moved to Boston in 2013 to be closer to his children, but came back to visit and stayed at Handmaker for one month in both 2014 and 2015.

Never a man to remain idle, a few years ago he began thinking about the idea of putting together a book with his, and the thoughts of other elders, on aging. He wanted to gather together the wisdom of those who had lived a long life in today’s world and share it with others. He reached out to his vast network of friends for help. There was an enthusiastic response to his request for contributions, and in the end he assembled essays from a diverse group of 73 collaborators from across the United States, aged 68 to 103.

His daughter, Ellen Beth Siegel, became the co-author of this endeavor, helping to organize the contents and prepare it for publication.  Ellen wrote that “Sharing this enterprise is a gift that I’m grateful to give him…and getting this book out and into the hands of others thinking about aging is something that I too have become passionate about”.

Irving enlisted the help of many others, including Mariah MacKenzie, a student from a local High School. Mariah helped Irving with his email communications, typed up the dictations of his essays, and sorted through, edited and formatted contributions. She wrote that “Being a part of the creation of this collaborative work has been a privilege, allowing me to learn, piece by piece, the way that Mr. Silverman and his peers see the process of aging…we can all benefit from learning to accept help when we need it, to accept people and their differences, and to experience life while we still can. Older people in our society can teach us so much.”

When asked what inspired him to create this book, Irving said, "mostly, because I love older people because their lives are so full of exciting stories of living well and accomplishing so much”.

Aging is inevitable, despite all that some do to avoid the appearance of aging. This book is a testament to how people can age gracefully with a fullness of life. It is a reminder that we need to take the time to listen to, to appreciate and embrace the wisdom and accomplishments of our elders. There is so much that we can learn from Irving and others. Irving is an absolute inspiration.

Copies of this book are available on Amazon:
https://www.amazon.com/Aging-Wisely-Wisdom-Our-Elders/dp/128414173X

Or at Jones and Bartlett Learning:
http://www.jblearning.com/catalog/9781284141733/

It is such an honor when one of our Tucson Community Rabbis comes to visit or speak at Handmaker. Imagine how blessed we felt to have three of our Community's Rabbis in the Great Room of Handmaker last month. The Great Room was filled with Handmaker residents and guests from the community who came to hear how some of our community Rabbis find G-d every day, and in the every day. Rabbi Yossi Shemtov, from Congregation Young Israel; Rabbi Thomas Louchheim, from Congregation Or Chadash; and Rabbi Robert Eisen, from Congregation Anshei Israel each shared some personal experiences on how they connect to G-d, and then took some questions from the audience.

Rabbi Shemtov began by telling the group that he believes that there is no such thing as a coincidence. That everything is divine providence. As the Baal Shem Tov said, everything that you see and hear in the world is a lesson on how to serve G-d better. He joked that when he is standing in line at Starbucks behind someone in the Jewish community who knows him, they usually order a breakfast danish instead of their usual breakfast sandwich – that is divine providence!

Rabbi Louchheim shared that he entered the Rabbinate to find out why Judaism was important to him, because it was never a question for him about making a greater connection to G-d. He finds himself studying more and more as he gets older, and that he is strengthened by what he has learned and will continue to learn. He feels that he has a covenantal relationship with G-d, which has guided him in the values of loving kindness and charity to help and connect with others.

Rabbi Eisen believes that in order to connect with G-d, we have to allow G-d to find us. We have to be open to the connection. If our cup is full of ourselves, then there is no room for G-d. It is all about attitude. He believes that we need to remember that every day is a gift.

Several questions from the attendees were focused on belief in G-d, belief in whether G-d wrote the Torah, and how we can connect to G-d when bad things happen to good people. Each Rabbi gave an answer from their perspective. And while there were some differing views, which made for an interesting discussion, there was much more common ground. In response to believing in G-d, Rabbi Shemtov stated that he thinks that even those who say they do not believe in G-d, actually do. He shared a story about someone who kept saying that he could not believe in G-d after the holocaust, because what kind of G-d would allow that to happen. When someone suggested that perhaps G-d made a mistake, the man said “G-d does not make mistakes”. To Rabbi Shemtov, this shows that the man did believe in G-d. In response to a question about whether we have to believe that the Torah was divinely written for us to follow the laws, Rabbi Eisen asked, why does it matter if it is written by G-d? If you want to follow the laws, he does not believe that it matters whether you believe it was divinely written or not. On the question of why bad things happen to good people, Rabbi Louchheim said that we learn and grow from whatever hardships are thrown at us. All three Rabbis agreed on that point.

We are grateful to these three wonderful Rabbis for taking the time to join us here at Handmaker, and we look forward to their next visit!

Jewish values and traditions have been passed along from generation to generation for thousands of years, and this fortunately continues on today. Pictured in the above photo is Phil Bregman (on the right), his wife Dani, daughter Emily, and cousin, Sondra Koven. Phil’s Great Uncle Murf Handmaker started Handmaker in 1963, and Phil is currently the Chair of the Handmaker Board. Their daughter, Emily, was paired up with Brian Litwak (Handmaker resident also pictured above left) as part of a volunteer program at Handmaker. This is a beautiful example of L’dor V’dor.

Tradition and values are passed along in many ways; most commonly from parent to child, grandparent to grandchild, or some relation to another. But sometimes inter-generational connections can be made between people who are not related by blood, giving additional opportunities to share traditions.

Just last week, Handmaker residents and Tucson Hebrew High Teens completed a year-long Better Together inter-generational program called Tracing Roots and Building Trees. This program was funded by a national philanthropy.

Each teen was paired up with a Handmaker resident, someone who might have otherwise been a stranger. Through the monthly themed meetings, the teens and residents learned about one another, shared stories, experiences and formed some endearing and enduring friendships. Midway through the program, every participant brought in a recipe to share with their partner, and told each other the story of why the recipe was meaningful to them. The teens transcribed the recipes and the stories, and along with many photos, all were put together in a recipe book aptly titled, “L’dor v’dor: From Generation to Generation”. At one of our last meetings, the teens and residents made one of the recipes from the book, a complicated 9 Egg Passover Cake. Some teens had never separated an egg before that day and some had never used an egg beater. Lessons were learned, traditions were shared; from generation to generation.

At our final celebration on April 30, the participants each received a copy of the cookbook, and several teens and seniors spoke about their experience with the program. One student shared that “I think that teens and seniors don’t get the opportunity to talk together and have conversations as much as we should…I enjoyed learning about them and their histories. I got far more out of [the program] than I expected.” And one of our residents said that meeting these teens “gives me hope for the future knowing that there are teens…in the world to carry on our traditions.”

There is a Mitzvah concerning elders, “Hiddur p’nai zaken”, which comes from a verse in Leviticus 19:32. The Hebrew can be translated as “You shall rise before the aged and show deference to the old”. But I prefer Danny Siegel’s translation, from the book, “A Heart of Wisdom: Making the Journey from Midlife through the Elder Years”. Siegel translates it as “You shall rise before an elder and allow the beauty, glory and majesty of their faces to emerge.” Based on what I observed as a coordinator of this program, seeing the beautiful smiles on the faces of our residents throughout the year, clearly this program has helped our teens fulfilled the mitzvah of hiddur p’nai zaken. 

Passover began this year on the evening of April 10 and ends on the evening of April 18. Passover, or Pesach in Hebrew, is a commemoration of the Jews’ Exodus from Egypt. Centered on the family or communal celebration of the Seder (ritual meal), Passover is probably one of the most well-known and beloved of all Jewish holidays.

As such, the approach of Passover evokes many happy memories for our Handmaker residents. Here are just a few that involve memorable foods, the “Maxwell House Hagaddah”, special traditions and seeing favorite family members.

Carol remembers her grandfather leaning on cushions during their Seders when she was little. “It was so traditional, so nice”. She loved that she got to see her cousins at Passover, they were scattered around Chicago and she did not get to see them often.

Gertrude’s father usually led their Seders, and he would “stretch out the Seders endlessly”. Her mother knew that the children couldn’t wait to eat, so, unbeknownst to their Dad, she would give her five children gefilte fish before the Seder so they would not be so impatient for it to end. Just the thought of that makes Gertrude laugh. Her Dad would also give his children a bag of filbert nuts to play marbles with every Passover. At the end of Passover, they would get to eat them. She liked them much better than the Matzah.

As an adult, Gloria’s family took turns hosting the different holidays. Her family had Passover, her sister did Rosh Hashanah and her sister-in-law did Thanksgiving. Her brother-in-law, Milton always led the Seder. Her favorite Passover story was when her sister, who was a judge, was presiding over a case involving the Mafia and had to have 24 hour guard during the trial, which happened to take place during Passover. Her sister’s son Danny wanted to open the door for Elijah, as they always did, but the adults said that they could not do so that year, due to security concerns. Danny was in tears, crying “How is Elijah going to drink his wine?”

At Les’ family Seders growing up, their tradition was for the kids to hide the Afikoman  and for the adults to search for it! (The Afikoman is a piece broken off from a matzah during the Seder and put aside to be eaten at the end of the meal. It is traditionally hidden during the Seder to be searched for by the children present.) At his family Seders, if the adults could not find it, the kids would usually get 25 cents, which was a lot of money in those days. Les remembers one year when the Seder was at his Grandparents’ house he went to the next door neighbor’s house and gave the Afikoman to them with strict instructions not to give it to anyone but him. When it came time, the adults looked for the Afikoman, but could not find it. They gave up, and Les’ grandfather asked him what he wanted, 25 cents? Les looked him right in the eye and told him that he wanted a bicycle. Les eventually did get the bicycle, but his mom was not very happy that he asked for such an extravagant Afikoman gift. It seemed to work out for him, though.

Lois remembers using the Maxwell House Hagaddahs during Seders growing up. She loved the special Passover muffins that her mom made every year. From what she can remember, they were made of crushed matzah softened with water, eggs and oil, and maybe a few other things, that were mixed together and baked in muffin tins. “When warm from the oven, they were delicious. And leftovers were cut in half and fried in a pan with some egg.”

We started some new traditions at our Passover Seders at Handmaker this year. We included the tradition of Miriam’s Cup on our Seder tables. Since G-d supplied Miriam with a miraculous well that accompanied the Hebrews throughout their journey through the desert, we placed a Miriam's cup on our Seder table to honor the important role of woman in our history and tradition. At the Seders, women were invited to fill Miriam's cup with water from their own glasses. This is a more modern tradition, and the residents appreciated this "new" addition to our Seder.

On the second night, everyone read the four questions, rather than the youngest attendee. And, in honor of Les’ family tradition, we had the youngest attendee hide the Afikoman, and the adults looked for it.

With our beautiful Passover Seders, Passover festival services on the first and last days of Passover, and a completely Kosher for Passover kitchen and food service throughout Passover, we strive to provide a warm and welcoming Jewish home for our residents this time of year, and always. While each resident may have their own special memories of past Passovers, we hope that this year’s Passover is also filled with delicious Passover foods, and time spent with loved ones, including dear friends that they have made while living here.

Chag Sameach!

When Hazel moved into Handmaker, I invited her to try out our Yiddish class. She told me that she was not interested in learning Yiddish, but would love to practice her Hebrew. I thought that maybe she wanted to brush up on her prayer book Hebrew at the age of 94. But no, it turned out that she is fluent in Hebrew, and wanted the opportunity to speak with someone else who was too. Luckily, with the help of Oshrat Barel, our Tucson Shlicha, Hazel met Rina.

But how and where did Hazel become fluent in Hebrew? She grew up in Brooklyn, NY and studied Hebrew beginning at the age of six. She went to Herzl Aliya Academy, which she said is like a Yeshiva, and then on to Brooklyn College to study Geology, English, Labor Law and the Sciences. After graduating from Brooklyn College, she began working as a copywriter in NY, living at home with her parents.

She was always very “zionistically active”, so when Israel became a state in 1948, she decided that she wanted to go see it for herself. She was curious, and tired of her job, so at the age of 26 she quit her job as a copywriter and told her parents that she was going to Israel. Her parents’ response? Her mother handed her back the money that she had been paying to them for rent, which allowed her to pay her way to Israel. Her Dad predicted that she would be back in a month, which she said is what made her decide that she was going to stay for much longer than that. She ended up staying for three years. And she said that it was the adventure of a lifetime.

It took her 2-1/2 weeks to get to Israel by boat, El Al did not yet exist. Hazel said that it was a lovely voyage. She saw the Rock of Gibraltar, and stopped in Athens and Naples on the way. Hazel stayed with a family friend when she first arrived in Jerusalem. She attended a Mizrahi Convention, and then was fortunate enough to get a position with the Jewish National Fund, writing for their monthly magazine.

It was an exciting time to be in Israel, and she loved every minute of it. Some highlights were swimming in Lake Kinneret and the Dead Sea; expanding on the “old fashioned Hebrew” that she had learned in America with the more modern Hebrew that she learned in Israel; meeting and visiting friends on Kibbutzim and Moshavim. She said that she was even shot at by the Transjordans from a precipice above the old city of Jerusalem.

In 1952 Hazel came back to the States to get married to a man that she had met in NY while at school. They had corresponded throughout her stay in Israel, and he had even visited her in Israel, and brought his car! She never really considered staying in Israel, as much as she loved her adventure, but she has been back many times to visit. Her son lives on a Moshav in Israel with his family, and she has kept in touch with friends that she met while there, which is how she has kept up on her Hebrew over the years. Her last visit was in 1985.

Hazel is so happy to have Rina visiting her these last few months at Handmaker. She has enjoyed getting to know Rina, who has had an interesting life as a travel agent in Israel traveling all over the world, and now as a caregiver in America. She loves speaking Hebrew with her. Hazel laments that she cannot always remember the words that she wants to use in Hebrew, but she is glad to have the opportunity to practice. Their time together brings back many happy memories of Israel, while also creating some new ones at Handmaker.

For the eighth year in a row, Handmaker residents have had the opportunity to participate in Project SOAR (Students and Older Adult Relationship). This is a program coordinated by Dr. Jenene Spencer, an instructor in the University of Arizona School of Pharmacy’s Practices and Science department, and is facilitated at Handmaker by Andrea Ramirez, our  Administrative and Volunteer Coordinator.

For a nine-week period, from February 15-April 19, first year Pharmacy students are on the Handmaker campus meeting with residents that they are paired up. They meet for an hour, once a week, as part of their training. Under the supervision of Dr. Spencer, the students review the residents’ charts to familiarize themselves with the medications that the residents are taking. Then they meet with the residents to practice their communication and interviewing skills. The nine week session ends with a celebration for the residents and students, complete with a slide show, and a huge cake with the U of A logo.

Participating residents love this program! Many have participated in the program year after year, and enjoy the weekly visits from the students, sharing their stories and learning about the students as well. If you go into the apartments of the residents who have participated in this program, you will see photos on their shelves of some of the pharmacy students that they have worked with. Clearly these students have had a meaningful impact on our residents’ lives.

This program is of great benefit to both students and residents. Residents get a special visitor weekly, as well as an extra pair of eyes to look over their medication lists. Students have the experience of speaking with older adults, practicing their communication skills while also making a new friend.

Just a few weeks ago one of residents came back from the CVS pharmacy across the street from Handmaker with a big grin on her face. “You will never guess who I saw at CVS! I saw one of the pharmacy students who I worked with a few years ago.”  You could see how proud she was of that student, and of the role that she played in the student’s education. So are we.

Tikkun Olam is a Jewish concept defined by acts of kindness performed to perfect or repair the world. Sometimes a charitable or beneficial act toward another person is called a mitzvah. And doing a mitzvah is one step toward making the world a better place. Whatever it is called, any act of kindness can make a difference and can make you feel good.

Many of the residents at Handmaker have completed many acts of charity and kindness throughout their lives. Some have been involved in Hadassah, National Council of Jewish Women, their Congregations, and numerous other charitable organizations.

When someone who has been active all their lives doing for others moves into an assisted living facility like Handmaker, it can be an adjustment for them to now be in a position where others are helping them. While many of them are happy to be cared for by others at this stage in their lives, there are also many who still want to be helping and helpful to others. At Handmaker we see friends helping friends on a regular basis. Random acts of kindness like saving a seat for someone at the lunch table, helping another to find their place in the siddur during services, sharing books or newspapers, or helping someone to get their arms through the sleeves in their sweaters. It is beautiful to see. We also like to provide opportunities, when possible, for residents in the Handmaker community to help others in the greater Tucson community.

This past fall, Handmaker participated in a canned food drive as part of the Jewish Federation of Southern Arizona’s Project Isaiah. The food that was collected went to the Tucson Community Food Bank. In addition, last month several Handmaker residents had an opportunity to visit a traveling exhibit that came to the Tucson JCC as part of the Mazon: This is Hunger Tour. Residents learned about hunger in America, how difficult it can be for some to make ends meet, and saw the faces of those who are hungry. It was a very moving experience.

Last week, residents were joined by 5th grade students from Congregation Or Chadash to pack snack bags for Sister Jose’s Women’s Center in downtown Tucson. (The Jewish Federation of Southern Arizona has taken on Sister Jose for their 70^th Anniversary Mitzvah project.) The bags were filled with protein bars, cookies, candies, a clementine orange and a beautiful handmade card with sentiments of encouragement and caring. The residents and students enjoyed making the bags and getting to know one another while doing so. They also felt so good to be able to help others less fortunate than themselves. They learned that Sister Jose Women's Center serves only women, many middle aged or older, which is a very vulnerable and under served part of the homeless population in Tucson. While we cannot completely repair all the fractures in the world in one afternoon, it certainly was a step in the right direction.

We just finished celebrating the Festival of Hanukkah…for eight nights. There certainly is a lot to celebrate. The Maccabees, a small army of untrained but determined Jews, defeated the larger, better trained and more powerful Syrian Army. And then, if that was not enough, when the Jews went to reclaim, restore and rededicate the Temple, the oil in the Temple’s menorah that was only supposed to last for one night, burned for eight full days. So, today, we celebrate the miracle of Hanukkah for eight days and nights. It is a fun and festive holiday, and it lasts for eight days and nights.

At Handmaker we celebrated every night. Every night, every menorah in each Handmaker neighborhood was lit and the blessings were sung. And each day and night we did something to make that evening’s celebration special. We sang Hanukkah songs most nights. We were blessed to have some young families come by and play dreidel a few nights, the Temple Emanu-El youth group (JCTEY) came by to play Hanukkah bingo one night, Rabbi Ruven Barkan from Congregation Anshei Israel joined us one night, Rabbi Thomas Louchheim from Congregation Or Chadash and some of the families from his congregation came by to play games another night. We even had a beautiful Hanukkah concert one night with Tucson native, Bryce Megdal. We fried and ate potato latkes and decorated Hanukkah cookies, and ate lots and lots of chocolate gelt. And it was fun. It was rewarding to see their happy faces, enjoying the celebrations, both the Jewish and non-Jewish residents. And while eight nights might sound like a few too many nights to celebrate, every day should really be celebrated when you reach your 80's or 90's, Hanukkah just gave us a good excuse.

But the most heartwarming part of the holiday this year to me, was the participation of some of our Jewish residents who do not regularly participate in some of our other Jewish activities. Not everyone wants to or can come to the Friday night service and dinner, or to the Shabbat morning service, to Torah Study, to Jewish Baking or to Rabbi Lectures. But, almost everyone who was asked, wanted to come light the menorah and sing the blessings, if they could. A few in some of our neighborhoods with the highest levels of care, who have a really hard time even getting out of bed, wanted to get into their wheelchairs and roll down the hall to see the menorah, hear the blessings, and maybe sing some songs. It was beautiful. You could see the recognition in their faces. They may not have been able to read the Hebrew blessings, but they moved their lips to it. Perhaps the ritual brought back some happy memories. Maybe they are big fans of the song Mao Tzur (Rock of Ages). Or it could be that they think that the menorah just looks beautiful when lit. Whatever their personal reasons were, they came. And to me, that was the greatest miracle of Hanukkah this year.

“My mom had not played the piano since my Dad passed away 15 years ago, but since she has been at Handmaker, she plays regularly. It is part of her therapy.” So says Monica Weiss, whose mother, Thelma Weiss has been playing piano by ear since the age of 6, and is one of our residents at Handmaker. Thelma wrote a song that was recorded in Spanish & English called “Thinking of You” which was inspired by a visit to Verona, Italy.  She wrote this beautiful song years later, and she still plays it by ear occasionally at Handmaker.

Thelma was born in Philadelphia to Russian immigrants.  She came from a very talented, musical, artistic family. They moved to New Jersey when she was still young, and according to Thelma, she had a “very busy social life” in New Jersey. When Thelma came to Tucson to visit her younger sister, she met her husband Frank. He was in the Air Force, and after they married, they traveled all over Europe together while he was based in Ramstein Air Base in Germany.

Frank went to Optometry school and become an Optometrist in the Air Force until he went into private practice in Tucson in 1957. Thelma was always there for her husband as a homemaker and mother to their daughter, Monica, and they were both active at Congregation Anshei Israel. When Thelma’s husband passed away 15 years ago, Monica was a little worried about how her mom would respond. While her mom did need some occasional help from a caregiver since she did not drive, Monica was impressed by her mother’s fortitude. Her mom was stronger than she thought. But, she had stopped playing the piano.

Nearly two years ago, Thelma had to have hip surgery. When she had to choose a place to do rehab after the surgery, Handmaker was the place that she wanted to be. It was a place that she had heard good things about, and she felt that she would be most comfortable there, being around other Jewish people. Thelma has been at Handmaker ever since.

While Thelma’s preference was to go home after she was healed from her hip surgery, she just could not get the care at home that she needed, and so the decision was made for Thelma to stay at Handmaker. According to her daughter Monica, Thelma has been more active in the last two years that she has been at Handmaker than she had been in the 20 years living when living at home. Between bingo, exercise class, Torah study, Shabbat services and the many other programs, Thelma is rarely in her room. Monica says that “Mom is well taken care of here. She is safe, she keeps busy, she does not just sit in her room, and that is thanks to the staff here at Handmaker.”

We are happy to have Thelma at Handmaker, whose beautiful piano playing often fills our halls.

With the celebration of Simchat Torah last week, we (the Jewish People) just concluded the annual cycle of Torah readings, and just began the cycle anew from the beginning with B’reisheet, “in the beginning”.  

Just about one year ago, I began working at Handmaker. While I did not realize it at the time, it seems quite fitting that I started here just as we began reading B’reisheet last year, at the beginning at the Torah, and just completed my first full year at Handmaker, appropriately, at the conclusion of the Torah. It is purely a coincidence, but still.

Twelve months ago I was literally trying to find my way around Handmaker. Trying to remember residents’ and co-workers’ names, which neighborhoods housed which residents, what residents were interested in, and above all, I was trying to figure out what I was going to do at Handmaker to make a difference to Handmaker residents. How was I going to get them more connected to the Tucson Jewish Community? It was exciting, but I have to admit, it was also a bit overwhelming.

And here I am now, at the end of my first full year, my first full cycle. I have observed every Jewish Holiday with the Handmaker community at least once. I have been to more birthday celebrations for 80-100 year olds than ever in my entire life. I have been saddened by the loss of some dear residents that I had gotten to know over the last year, and have been thrilled to welcome many new faces as well. I know most of the Assisted and Independent Living Residents by name, and while I have certainly not gotten it all figured out, I have come a long ways since those first days.

We have a nice rhythm of Jewish programming going on. Torah study on Mondays and Fridays; Cooking once a month; Yiddish once a month; Shabbat services and dinner every Friday night, with guests on the last Friday of the month; Saturday morning Shabbat services in the Great Room. Our inter-generational program, Tracing Roots and Building Trees, is in its second year of meeting one Sunday a month. Residents have the opportunity to go on one “Jewish” outing about once a month. We are fortunate to have Rabbis and others in the community come to Handmaker to lecture fairly regularly, and Religious School and THA Students visit frequently. We also have more and more students doing their Mitzvah projects here at Handmaker. Is this all making a difference? Is this what I am supposed to be doing? Is the community getting more connected to Handmaker? Only time will tell.

Each annual cycle of reading the Torah is the same, and yet different. The words that we read may be the same, but what we learn from the words, or how we interpret the words may change as we change each time we read it. This was my first cycle at Handmaker. It was a wonderful year for me, and I think that I did some good. I have certainly learned a lot.  And like the annually recurring Torah readings, hopefully this cycle will keep going on, repeating, but getting more clearly understood and appreciated year after year. Wishing you and your families a wonderful, happy and healthy new year!

The Jewish month of Tishrei, which began on the 2^nd of October this year, is completely filled with Jewish holidays. It begins with Rosh Hashanah, a celebration of the Jewish New Year, followed about one week later by Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement or repentance. A few days after that we begin the celebration of Sukkot, a harvest festival commemorating the Israelites’ 40 years of wandering in the desert, where we dine in a sukkah for 8 days. Sukkot ends one week later with Shemini Atzeret and Simchat Torah, the celebration of the Torah, when the cycle of the Torah reading in the Synagogue ends and restarts. The number and variety of these holidays is enough to make your head spin. But it is also very engaging for the residents at Handmaker. For them, this month full of holidays is a month steeped in a deep connection to their Judaism, to the Jewish community, to one another, as well as a month of learning and remembering.

Residents feel so fortunate that every Jewish holiday is observed at Handmaker. They enjoy special delicious holiday meals, services for all holidays, and even a Sukkah for them to eat in! They feel at home with these familiar observances, and do not have to go far to pray, just down the hall to the Great Room. Along with our Jewish Residents, we also have many guests who join us to observe these holidays, as well as some non Jewish residents who attend. Elaine is one example. While she is not Jewish, she has lived at Handmaker for nearly a year, and has really enjoyed learning about Judaism, going to as many Jewish holiday events as she can. She asks great questions, and fully participates. When she learned that it is traditional to wear white to the High Holiday Services, she came dressed in white. Elaine is also one of our most active participants in our weekly Torah Study.

Many members of our staff are interested in learning about the holidays as well, all wanting to know the proper greeting for each holiday. Several came to hear the Shofar as it was blown during the High Holidays. Those who helped serve the Erev Sukkot holiday meal under the Sukkah wanted to understand the meaning of the Sukkah. It is wonderful that they are so curious and eager to learn.

At Handmaker, where we provide Jewish Services for the Aging, everyone has some role in the Jewish Holiday observances and celebrations, from building the Sukkah, helping residents get to the services and meals, to making or serving the delicious holiday meals. This participation of all to help make this a Jewish home leads to a greater understanding of our different backgrounds, and increases the connections to each other in this great community. Chag Sameach.

Every Friday morning at 9am about a dozen Handmaker residents gather in the Rubin Café at Handmaker for their weekly dose of Brain Games. Led by Handmaker’s Assisted Living Manager, Anne Lopez, this class brings smiles to the faces of residents, while also helping them to work on their memories.

“As we age, our short term memories fail, which can be really frustrating. Unfortunately, after a certain point, there is not that much that we can do to restore it. But we don’t lose our long term memories in the same way, and we need to keep those stimulated. People can sometimes remember what they wore to their first day of school, but don’t always remember the bigger things. We need to poke at those long term memories, and Brain Games helps to do this.”

Anne comes up with words – usually people, places or things – that are connected with an historic event of the day. Last week she started with the word “Desegregation”. She put 13 short lines up on the blackboard and then asked each resident, in turn, to pick a letter. If they chose a letter that was in the word, she wrote the letter on the line where it fit in the word. Each resident had an opportunity to guess what the word was after their turn if they picked a letter that was in the word. (It reminds me of the game “hangman” that I used to play with my kids.) When the word is finally guessed, one of residents said that she did not know what that word meant. Anne explained the meaning and then told all of the residents that on September 9, 1963, four black students in Huntsville Alabama become the first children to desegregate schools in that town and the entire state.

So began a short history lesson, leading into a discussion between the residents. One resident said that he thought that we still had those problems today, another expressed concern about all the hate there seems to be in the world today, which led to discussion about fears that many residents have about the upcoming presidential election. And so it goes. Anne just moderates, not expressing her opinion, just letting it go where the residents want, stimulating memories and ideas as they go along.

This class goes on for close to an hour, repeating the same scenario with 4-5 words that Anne chooses because of their connection to that day in History. Each word puzzle provides a little short term memory work leading to more long term memory work in the history lesson and current events discussion. Just what Anne was hoping for, and the residents love it. Every bit of mental stimulation that they get helps, and most importantly, a good time is had by all.

Handmaker Residents, Beppie and Alex Lutgendorf celebrate 68 years of marriage on September 2nd, “the day the new Star Trek postage stamps come out,” says Alex. He has been a stamp collector since he was eight years old.

In August 1945, while waiting for his paperwork to go through to return to the United States, where he was born and lived until he was three years old, Alex went to work for a Dutch newspaper called “Vrije Volk” (Free People), in Amsterdam. He met Beppie who was training him to replace her position in the advertising department. She had been promoted to the publishing department. Alex, at 18 years old, knew right away that he wanted to make 16 year old Beppie his wife. For nearly a year, he sent her American candies, like Life Savers, that he would get from a relative who lived in the U.S.. He would find every opportunity to see her, delivering “misdirected” mail to her department.

On July 4, 1946, Alex sailed for the U.S.. His mother and Beppie saw him off at port. Beppie thought that she would never see him again.

Two years later, Alex wrote Beppie’s parents, asking for her hand in marriage. He was working in the Air Force in San Antonio, and had saved enough money to have a home built. Although he never asked Beppie to marry him, and they never dated, they were married days after his arrival back to The Netherlands. They were very much in love. On September 4, 1948 they were on a ship to New York then a train to San Antonio, where they started their family.

Beppie and Alex have four children, two grandchildren and one great-grandchild. They have lived in several places in the U.S., including Alaska. They used to have a motorhome and they enjoyed traveling all over the country. When the children were small, they went on many picnics and  camping trips. As a hobby, Beppie loved making ceramics.

They moved to Tucson in 1967, when Alex retired from the Air Force as an air traffic controller. They have been living at Handmaker since December 2013 with their rescued dog, Chey-Chey. Their advice to couples: Try to see each other’s way. You don’t have to be right.

This blog was written by Angela Salmon.