Friendship is Essential at Any Age

“Friendship is essential,” says Rabbi Richard Safran, a resident in Handmaker’s Rubin Assisted Living Neighborhood. Having lived in many different cities and counseled many individuals as both a Rabbi and a Chaplain throughout his 92 years, Rabbi Richard has seen firsthand how important friendships are to quality of life.

Human beings are social creatures. And even the most introverted among us need some social connection to survive and thrive. Research has shown that people who engage with others in meaningful activities tend to live longer, happier, and healthier lives.

Yet, as we age, many people are more alone than when they were younger. This can lead to social isolation and loneliness, contributing to health problems like cognitive decline, dementia, depression, and even heart disease and stroke.

When we are young, there are many opportunities to make new friends on the playground, at school, through clubs, sports, camps, and other activities. Young adults often develop friendships with co-workers at or through work, religious affiliations, and through their children and partners. But it seems to get a bit harder to develop new friendships for older adults. Friend circles get smaller as people grow older and may grow apart, move away from one another, and even pass away. Older adults who are not as active and involved in their communities or have other interests may find it harder to actively meet new people and make new friends. And the forced social isolation from the COVID pandemic has certainly not helped.

One of the benefits of living communally at a Senior Living Community such as Handmaker is that there are always other people around who are also looking to make a new friend. While the prospect of opening yourself up to new friendships may seem daunting at age 75 or older, it is not impossible. And oftentimes some of the closest friendships can be made during this time of life.

Take Erma and Toddy, for example. They both moved in to Handmaker within a week of one another and found themselves living next door to each other. On one of their first mornings at Handmaker, they both walked out of their apartments at the exact same time. Erma looked at Toddy and asked her if she wanted to walk down to breakfast together. Toddy said “Sure,” and that was the beginning of what has been one of the best and closest friendships of their lives for each of them. These days, they are almost always together. They find comfort in having a best buddy to walk with to some of the many activities at Handmaker.

If you look around Handmaker and observe the residents regularly, you will see that Erma and Toddy are not the only tightknit pair. You will notice many other special friendships that have developed between residents. Roslyn and Sarah eat most meals together, as do Kim, Diana and Barbara in the Rubin Assisted Living Neighborhood. If Michael is not in his room, he can most often be found in Cazzondra’s room or strolling the halls with her. In the Rich Long Term Care Neighborhood, roommates Karyl and Jolinda never seem to run out of conversation. When you walk into the Kalmanovitz Memory Care Neighborhood, you will often see Maria, Yolanda, and Sylvia chatting away as they color together, and Aldene and Marilyn are rarely found far apart.

At any age, we all need someone to laugh with and share life’s joys, as well as an occasional shoulder to lean on, and someone to look out for you. Friendships prevent isolation and loneliness and enrich our lives. And in the words of Handmaker Resident Rabbi Richard Safran, “Friendship is essential.”

So take a chance and say “Sure” when someone asks you if you want to walk with them to breakfast. It might be the start of something special. Because it is never too late in life to make a new friend.